Wedding #1

I haven't been very good at posting to my blog. I hope to post more, but I've had some good reasons: weddings. Yes, plural. 2015 was quite eventful for our family. We enjoyed many blessings, one of which was the marriage of our oldest daughter, Angela, in June, to a wonderful young man named Jeff. They were sealed for time and all eternity in the Payson LDS Temple in Payson, Utah.

Once in a while, as parents, we get to have parent paydays. For me, 2015 was full of wonderfully happy paydays. 

Angela met Jeff years ago in the Latter-Day Celebration Choir at Utah Valley University. She was very impressed when she first met him. He was Joseph and she was Mary on a float for a parade. She spoke highly of a young man who had the "voice of an angel" when he sang. They went out on a date, but life intervened and though they remained friends over the next few years, they both dated other people.

But, Angela could not forget Jeff. She'd even written in her journal shortly after meeting him that he was her perfect match and he just needed to realize that. It took a few years, but they ended up together.

And I agree with Angela, Jeff is her perfect match!

From Being Dumped to Being Married--Happy Anniversary

It's hard to believe that we are celebrating our 29th anniversary (especially because I'm only 21 myself). I still remember the first time I met Del. It was Sunday, May 20, 1984. I was speaking in sacrament meeting in the DeJong concert Hall on BYU campus. My talk was on celestial marriage. I didn't want to speak on that topic because after a few bad experiences, I was a little anti-marriage. A friend of mine convinced me to speak on it.

I looked out over the congregation and there he was. Bright blond hair and a big, warm smile. I was immediately drawn to him and wondered who the new guy in the ward was. I soon found out that he had been called as the "dad" of our family home evening group . . . and I was called as the "mom." I really had no idea it would become a permanent arrangement. :)

Our courtship was a little bumpy. We started dating, but then he had a serious car accident and had to go home to CO. He invited me to come see him, but never called. I spent the summer in CA working to save for my next year at BYU. I waited for him to call. All summer. But he didn't. So when I went back up to BYU, with my roommate's encouragement, I called him. And I gave it to him. I told him he was a big jerk. And that was that.

I dated other guys and had no contact with him. He dated other girls. Lots of other girls. He even drove up to Salt Lake from CO to see a girl. Right past Provo, where I was living. But he didn't stop to see me. (I learned all of this later).

During Christmas break, I went home to Santa Barbara and worked at the theater during my break. One day I came home to a box of long-stemmed roses. I thought they were from another guy. When I read the card, with Del's name on it, I almost fell over. I was still mad that he dumped me. How dare he have the nerve to send me roses. And wish me a Merry Christmas. And ask me to call him. No way was I going to do that. And then I did.

He flew me out to his house in CO and that was it. I knew I wanted to marry him (but I made him work for it, because I was still mad he dumped me). We were sealed in the Los Angeles temple on April 25th.

In all of my imaginings as a young girl, I could never have dreamed up the amazing marriage and life I have. I never knew that marriage could be so wonderful or that a man could be so good and so perfect for me. A man who is so patient and kind and loving. He wakes up in the morning with a smile and is cheerful all the time. He is full of love for his fellowman and loves God with all of his heart. He serves others without complaint. He loves me despite all of my many weaknesses and he loves all of our kids. He is faithful, trustworthy, and compassionate. He builds me up and supports me in my writing dreams. He stands by me and is loyal. He's funny and makes me laugh (even when he tells the corniest jokes). I love to hear his laugh. I have been so very blessed for the last 29 years and I look forward to an eternity of happiness with him.

Happy Anniversary to my one true love!

Imperfect Love, Chapter 1, Part 1

A plus sign.

Lauren Wilson blinked the hopeful tears back. Was she seeing it right? She flicked on the bathroom light for a better look and scrutinized the pregnancy test wand.

Definitely a plus sign.

She leaned against the wall. A baby.

Some moments are milestones, and some milestones are moments. Lauren gazed at the wand again. This is definitely both.

After trying for over two years—well, she seemed to be more intent on conceiving than her husband, Paul, but that didn’t matter now. The wondering, hoping, then crying, month after month, didn’t matter. Nothing mattered now. She was pregnant. Excitement bubbled up inside her. She’d finally have a baby and the happily-ever-after she’d dreamed about since she was a little girl.

Lauren rested her hand across her stomach, her fingers tingling. After all this time, it was finally her turn.

Finally.

She rushed into the bedroom to find her cell phone and call Paul with the news. Her anxious fingers stumbled over the keypad, searching for his speed dial number. What if he’s in a meeting? What if he can’t take the call? I don’t want to leave this on his voicemail. 

She ended the call before it could go through and sat on the bed. This wasn’t something she wanted to tell him over the phone. It was too momentous. Too amazing. Too wonderful.

A photo caught her eye. She handled the delicate metal frame, memories of her wedding flooding her mind. What a perfect day it had been at the church on Third Avenue in Durango, her hometown. It was such a beautiful beginning to their life together, and now they’d move to the next step—adding a baby to their family.

Ideas of how to tell Paul swirled around her head. She wanted to make it special for him, so she decided to take some time to come up with just the right way to let him know he was going to be a daddy. Daddy. The word felt sweet and satisfying on her tongue.

Lauren glanced at the clock on the light green wall opposite the bed. Seven thirty. She’d have to hurry—she didn’t want to be late for her first class.

Her hands stroked her stomach. I’m going to have a baby. I can’t wait to tell Paul. He’ll be as thrilled as I am.

Stay tuned for the next installment.

You can purchase Imperfect Love here.

Wedding Anniversary, Sister Wives, and Marriage

Twenty-eight years ago today, my husband and I knelt across the altar in the Los Angeles Temple and were married and sealed together for time and all eternity. In those years, we have added ten beautiful and talented children, a wonderful daughter-in-law, and a sweet baby granddaughter. I feel so blessed to have this big, happy family and to be married to my best friend who still makes me laugh, holds my hand, and brings me chocolate and roses for no reason. I love him more today than I did twenty-eight years ago and I look forward to an exciting future of loving him even more and growing old together as we watch our family expand with in-laws and grandchildren.

I've been thinking about marriage. I feel so blessed to have such a happy and wonderful marriage to a man who has sacrificed so much to make me, and our children, happy. Marriage is ordained of God and is to be respected and honored. Too many in our society disrespect and dishonor it and I think we see the effects of that more and more. I support and recognize marriage as being between one man and one woman. Until Heavenly Father, through His living prophet on the earth, changes that definition, that is the only union I recognize: between one man and one woman. I believe marriage is not for convenience or experimentation or even just for pleasure. I believe it is to join a man and a woman who have covenanted to pledge their lives to each other and to create a family.

I've been watching some episodes of Sister Wives. It's fascinating to watch them. I had to laugh at one episode where they were talking about how hard it is to be raising 12 kids between them--my sister has 12 kids herself and she and her husband are an amazing example of righteous parenting and they do it together without any extra help. I don't support a polygamous lifestyle and would not be interested in participating in one myself, but I have to give Kody Brown credit for being willing to take care of his women and all of his children. He seems to be a devoted husband and father. Too many men make babies with multiple women and then abandon the women and the children. He's willing to step up and take responsibility and be involved in their lives. I'm not sure how he can balance 4 "wives" but they seem to make it work. And they have similar values to me, especially their emphasis on family and family unity.

If the supreme court rules that homosexual marriage is legal, then I would expect Kody Brown and other polygamists to demand their right to be married. I would also expect other groups and individuals to demand their rights. And if we change the definition of marriage, how can we deny marriage between siblings, cousins, even between parents and children? Many may say that would never happen, but I would've never guessed that homosexual marriage would have been considered. these other unions may sound wrong, even distasteful, but changing the definition of marriage for one group necessarily opens the door to changing it for all groups. And people who currently support homosexual marriage will also have to support these other forms of "marriage."

No matter what the law of the land is, or may become, God's laws cannot be legislated in a courtroom or through a ballot box. We can fight against His laws, we can ignore them and break them, but that does not change them. Whether we believe in God or not does not change the fact  that He exists and that He is real.

People can choose to live whatever lifestyle they choose. We have all been given free agency. But with that agency comes responsibility and accountability. God's gift to us is agency and our gift to God is how we use that agency. I have lived long enough, had enough of my own experiences, and seen enough around me to know, without any doubt whatsoever, that following God's laws and keeping His commandments brings joy and peace. Breaking them brings unhappiness and misery. It doesn't matter who we are or where we live, this is true for all of us.

As I celebrate my anniversary with the man of my dreams who has made me a better person and who loves me unconditionally, I am absolutely convinced that God ordains marriage between one man and one woman and when we adhere to His laws we experience a multiplicity of blessings. We can choose whatever road we want to take, but there is only one road that leads back to God. There is only one road that brings the blessings of peace and joy in mortality. I will be forever grateful for His blessing on my marriage and for being able to find my soul mate.

Announcing . . .

My daughter is engaged. Woo hoo!! They plan to be sealed in the Manti Temple in August. We're all very excited. We love her fiance. He's such a good kid--strong testimony, hard worker, kind, fun, treats her like a queen, exactly the kind of young man I wanted her to find. I'm thrilled for her!

I'm also a little sad that she'll leave the nucleus-stage of my family and enter the stage when she will  create her own. Yes, this is what I've raised her for. I want her to create her own eternal family. I want her to experience the joy of marriage and celebrate each life that they'll create for their own family. But, I didn't know the time would pass so fast or come so soon. I've spent the majority of my life focused on my husband and children. I enjoy them and love to be around them. We always have so much fun together.

I knew everything would change when my son got married--we'd add another daughter to our family and they'd begin their life together, but I'd already let him go to serve his mission. I'd already adjusted to his absence from the family for two years. I absolutely love his wife and I'm so glad he married her.

Now, it's time to let my daughter go to start the next stage of her life. I'm so happy for her. I know this is the right choice for her. I'm proud of her for waiting for the right kind of young man and for setting her goal to marry in the temple and sticking to it. I guess I just didn't think it'd happen so fast.

I'm thinking I'll have a full and busy summer ahead of me, but it's all good. I'm excited to go dress shopping, though I'm sure I may shed a few tears.

He's Married

What an incredible day filled with great happiness and joy. My son was sealed in the Oquirrh Mountain Temple on Friday to his sweet, beautiful bride. I have never seen him smile so big and be so happy. I was very grateful to witness his marriage and so thankful he was sealed in the temple.

Parenting isn't always easy. It's fraught with plenty of ups and downs, trials and tribulations, mistakes. Of course, happy times are sprinkled throughout as well. As parents, we sacrifice our time, talents, and energy in raising our children. We teach them, pray for them, and suffer with them. They occupy our thoughts, spend our money, and teach us patience. Every once in a while, we have a "parent payday." The first time I went through the temple with my son, the day he went into the MTC, and the day he returned home from serving an honorable mission were all "parent paydays." However, Friday was the biggest payday yet. To see him kneel across the altar, pledging his life, love, and eternity to his wonderful bride and make covenants with her and the Lord made me realize how truly blessed I am. How truly blessed we all are to have the gospel and the opportunity to seal our families together for all of eternity.

Friday overshadowed all the begging and pleading to turn in homework, to keep curfew, and to clean his room. Friday overshadowed the dirty underwear he'd leave in the bathroom regularly, the damage done to the cars when he was learning to drive, and the times he'd spring things on me with no warning. Friday overshadowed all of it. The potty training, the arguing while he was in middle school, the parent-teacher conferences when I learned he hadn't turned in assignments, and all the time I spent driving him back and forth for school activities. Friday trumped everything. It was a glorious day wherein I saw the fruits of my labor. Parenting certainly isn't easy, but it's definitely worth it, especially when you can sit in a sealing room holding the hand of your child, knowing that he's in the right place, at the right time, being sealed by the right authority.

In a world where morality is belittled and religion is mocked, where messages on every side urge us to to break commandments, where the world delights in ridiculing standards, it is no small feat for a young couple to enter the temple worthily and make covenants with the Lord. Friday, Satan had to admit defeat as my son and his new bride exited the temple, sealed for time and all eternity as husband and wife. Though Satan will continue to work on my son, as he will work on me and everyone else, he did not prevent this sealing. That is definitely cause for celebration.

Yes, Friday was a payday.

Aren't They Cute?

My son and his soon-to-be-bride. I think I'll have gorgeous grandbabies, though I'm certainly not ready to be a grandma. I'm not even sure I'm ready to be a mother-in-law . . .

Marriage: Between One Man and One Woman

Some hot issues are on state ballots this year. One of those topics is defining marriage. In both California and Arizona stakes have presented special firesides in an effort to motivate members of the LDS Church to vote for such a critical issue.

In California, voters had already cast the majority of their votes to define marriage as between one man and one woman. Yet, judges overturned the voice of the people and allowed homosexual couples to marry. I don’t quite understand why or how judges would have the right to overturn the voice of the people. What is the purpose of voting if a small group of judges can overturn it on their own whim?

A well-publicized story about a school class taking a field trip to witness a homosexual marriage has spurred the debate. States are now struggling to define marriage. Honestly, it’s a definition I never thought we actually needed, but in light of this recent field trip, it’s obvious that our society has denigrated to the point that the very fabric of our society is unraveling. I’d like to point out that if a school field trip included witnessing a Catholic marriage, we’d have the ACLU jumping up and down and screaming that the school had violated church and state and trampled on the rights of students who didn’t want to witness such an event. Interestingly enough, the ACLU has not come to the defense of the students who were offended by a homosexual marriage.

It’s interesting to note also, that when the subject of polygamy is introduced, there’s quite a vehement reaction. In my own experience, many people mock the LDS Church because of its polygamous practice that ended over 100 years ago. People today still talk about polygamy in the early days of the Church and point fingers at the leaders claiming they instituted polygamy for the sole purpose of exploitation and sexual gratification. Today, polygamists can be arrested. After all, it’s legal to have sexual relations with as many partners as possible and to create children, it’s just not legal to marry those partners. While I do not support the practice of polygamy, and those that practice polygamy are not members of the LDS Church, I find it curious that our society is quick to condemn a man if he wants to marry and care for more than one wife, but not if he wants to marry another man. Isn’t there some sort of lop-sided reasoning to that?

Marriage is ordained of God. Marriage is between one man and one woman. Once we change the definition to include a small, very vocal minority, how can we then deny it to any other minority? How can we keep polygamy illegal and allow same-sex marriage? How can we deny marriage between siblings or cousins? We cannot change the definition of marriage and expect that we won’t have to make allowances for other groups.

It’s apparent that Satan’s assault on the family continues to rage. We must fight back. We must define marriage as between one man and one woman. God commanded Adam and Eve to multiply and replenish the earth and that commandment has never been revoked. A same-sex couple cannot keep this commandment. The whole idea of same-sex couples completely opposes God’s plan and defies nature.

I do not hate people who choose to live a homosexual lifestyle, but I do not support that lifestyle. I do not think same-sex couples should be allowed to marry. Our society is only as strong as our families. Each time a family breaks down, it weakens our society. We cannot allow the definition of marriage to change because we must work to strengthen our families and our society. It’s imperative that we vote to retain the definition of marriage as between one man and one woman.

Return to the neighborhood.

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Save the Family

The song was written by Joy Lundberg and Janice Kapp Perry.

Our nation is only as strong as our families. We must do our best to strengthen our families.

Enjoy the video and feel free to pass it along.

Shame on CA Judges

Something shameful has happened in California, the state where I was born and raised. Judges have overturned the voters and are now allowing same-sex marriages. The voters of CA have been mocked and, I'm sure, are left wondering why they voted at all.

While I do not support same-sex marriages and believe marriage is only between one man and one woman, I am equally concerned that a few judges would have so much power as to overturn a decision made by over 60% of the voters. What happened to the voice of the people? Is this the beginning of the unraveling of our governmental system? Why vote if that vote will then be overturned by judges seeking to advance their own political agendas? It's sobering to see this happen.

For a great article on this subject visit here.

Further, when we change the definition of marriage where will it end? Where do we draw the line? How can same-sex marriage be legal, but polygamy is not? Will cousins, siblings, or parents and their children be allowed to marry one another?

Will this be our society's downfall?